i believe in love

the most beautiful people

we have known are those who
have known defeat, known suffering,
known struggle, known loss
and have found their way
out of the depths
these people have
an appreciation, a sensitivity
and an understanding of life
that fills them with compassion,
gentleness and a deep loving concern
beautiful people...do not just happen.

-author unknown

somebody sent this poem to me today.  said it made her think of me.  i'm flattered.  this is beautiful poetry.  to her, i am a beautiful person.  i'm honored.  she's known me for a long time.  watched me try. struggle. fail. hurt. grow. love. learn. succeed. be.  she is probably on the "top-five" of people who know me best...along with "other parents" i've adopted throughout the years.  i'm lucky to be loved by many.  so many.  i spent a lot of years feeling cheated.  i was wrong.  i've grown into an individual of confidence. happiness. love. joy. smiles. beauty.  i worked hard to get here.  but people like kathy helped me on my way.  thanks to the many.

Goodness...there's more where that came from.

Whoa...blogger changed.  Cool.  Change is good.  Keeps us sharp, young, on-our-toes.

Well, things have stayed awesome.  I think they're going to for quite some time.  Maybe forever...who knows?  Time will tell.  I'm worried that I may stay up until a ridiculous hour again tonight.  I've gotten into this habit.  I suppose it's a fine time to start working on a snowboard edit...

Brett came to town last week for a few days.  Utah>Iowa.  We all know it but very few of us native Iowans have accepted it.  Friday night we watched Frozen.  I can't believe I wasted 93 minutes of my life AGAIN.  Well, I guess not really since I slept through most of it this time.  Saturday we had a big day planned.  We celebrated Earth Day, it's not just for hippies and environmentalists...or maybe I am one.  Who cares.  I took Kenai on his walk Saturday morning.  We walked our normal route.  Down 26th street.  We met an old Mormon Hippie.  She was really funny.  She knew everyone in the neighborhood.  She told me where every one of them lived...I'll never remember that.  She also told me to come over for dinner sometime...sure, see you then.  Funny lady.  After a walk and some fresh air Brett, Jaymee and I all hopped on our two wheelers and pedaled our way out to the Ogden Nature Center.  They have OWLS!  I love owls.  I have two more tattoos planned.  An owl is one of them.  I also learned about a local farm where I can get eggs!  I will know exactly where they came from, I suppose I could even meet the chicken if I really wanted to.  That reminds me of the first episode of Portlandia.  So funny.  Oh yeah, I'm making my own laundry detergent also.  Sue me.  Or call me a hippie, I don't mind.  I get called a hippie a lot these days, I'll embrace it.  After the nature center we pedaled to Wal Mart.  We bought weenies and mallows for roasting over the fire pit in my back yard.  The Primary President and her husband joined the fun.  That was a bonus.  We all laughed.  Really hard.  It was a night to remember...if you can.

Sunday Brett flew home.  I drove to Salt Lake to ride bikes with some of the best biker bikers that I know.  They were taking me to a new place.  Emigration Canyon.  I'd heard of it.  Never been.  It was great.  It was a climb.  But it didn't seem that much like a climb.  There were two cute little restaurants in the canyon.  We rode to the Little Mountain Summit.  I was glad.  I just needed to conquer a mountain, big or little it mattered not.  Mostly, I need some think time and that I had.  I thought about some things.  I had a realization, epiphany, inspiration.  Whatever you wanna call it, I had one.  It was great.  Makes ya see life a little clearer.  Sunday evening I enjoyed dinner with the Halls.  It was great.  Kenai had his very first doggie brawl.  Haus didn't like my pup much.  I was scared.  Nobody got hurt.  It was fine.  Kenai's been a bit jumpy ever since but he'll be fine.  He's a wonder dog.

Last night I went for a run.  I ran 5 miles!  And I did it in my new "barefoot" running shoes.  It was great.  My body felt so good.  I didn't determine ahead of time how far I would run.  I ran until I was tired and then I turned around and had to run the entire way back.  It worked.  My heart rate monitor told me that I completed 200% of my suggested workout.  Fantastic.  I think the "barefoot" shoes are gonna work out too.  I had less knee pain than I do in normal shoes.  Time will tell.  I'll keep running.

Tonight I spent the evening in Salt Lake City with a famed crowd that I love.  We discussed and planned Little Red Riding Hood.  It was great.  I wore my new trucker hat just to practice.  I get to drive the big truck to Logan again this year.  It's my favorite part of the year.  See you there.

Writing about all of this stuff is great.  Life is good.  I am happy.  Really happy.  Not fake happy.  Or forced happy.  Real happy.  The big picture behind all of this great stuff going on in my life is that I must have taken a right turn somewhere.  I must be on the path the universe has paved for me.  The world feels right.  Natural.  Good.  I've been honest with myself.  Learned a few things about me in the process.  I am motivated.  I am positive.  I am content.  I am real.  I am honest.  Most of all I am really happy.  I'm a lucky kid.

And to think...

Yesterday I intended to write a blog about how many really great things have happened to me in the last two weeks. I probably would have said something in there about how life really couldn't get any better right now. I didn't think it could. But it just did.

Member this?

Really though. Two weeks. Out. Of. This. World. First there was my excitement over a new 10-key adding machine. I tried to fight the idea that I'm a nerdy accountant but instead I've decided to embrace it. Why try to be something I'm not?


I had a coffee date with an old pal. It gave me peace, confidence, freedom, and joy. I'd been looking everywhere for those things. Thanks.

I got to ride my bike on the Ogden River Parkway with some real good friends. WEST!
Then there was hanging out with Janet. Man, was that ever a great time. She's a gem. It's nice when people like you enough that they'll still hang out with you even when they're not getting paid to do so. Really. Thanks Janet. If life goes my way we'll do it again sometime.

Oh man, then there was Saturday. This is one for the books. Seriously. I don't even think you'll get it. You might. It's hard to say. So there I was, at Snowbasin, closing weekend. There was a rail jam, an all-girl rail jam. No way! Not even a chance. I've never ridden a single feature with a gap approach before (maybe this is why) and this day was not going to be the day that I did. Or was it? Yes, it was. I entered the competition. Scared out of my brain. I hiked the course to practice lots of times. Eventually I did get pretty good at it, although my goal for next year is to not stick my butt out so far when I ride a box. There was excitement. Joy. Cheering. Girraficorns. Nose presses. 50/50's. Pictures. Prizes. Sun. But mostly there was fun. And that's why I did it. Oh yeah, bee tee dub...I got first place. No big deal. STOKED!

On Monday, the least favorite of all the days, the Primary President brought me a plant.

She's great. And she has a name, it's Becca. Sometimes her Mormon shows, like when she brings you a plant. Maybe that's why I like her so much. She has a kid who wants to stuff giant noodle shells with cheese...naturally I thought of her when I was at the grocery store the other day.

Is your mind about to blow with all of this blissful goodness? I figured. There's more so hold onto your hats.

I had lunch with Michelle King. Remember her? She's a genuinely good human being. I was pretty sure of it before. After our conversations over lettuce and lentils I am certain of it. Sure, she's a normal human. I always knew that too. But she cares. She cares in actuality, not the pretend kind of care because she learned on Sunday that she should. The real kind. That's cool. And that's why I answered her pointed questions honestly. Because she cared. And she didn't judge me. That's cool too. Thanks Michelle.

And then there's Friday. Shortly before I left work for the day I got an email. Attached to the email was a voice mail sound file. A voice mail from Bob. He's one of my customers. He called simply to tell my boss that I did great. That I am professional. That I am knowledgeable. That he enjoyed working with me. Essentially, he called to say, "Good job, Brooke." And I thank him. Sometimes people just don't know the impact they have on a life. Thanks Bob.

And then there's today. It's still to soon to say. But I know one thing. I'm happy. Giddy. I was jumping out of my skin earlier. Oh man. Once I heard I started working at supersonic speeds. I think I did at least a week's worth of work in two hours. Wow. It still doesn't seem real. I still wonder if I'm being punked. Maybe. Maybe not. Time will tell.