bet on your anger if that's what you choose. nothing's gonna change, everybody's gonna lose.

oh boy.  i'm rarely at a loss.  especially for words.  but....  here i sit.  so. much. awesome.

yesterday i was making plans (also known as lists) for my upcoming trip(s).  now having a better idea of the schedule for my arizona trip i reached out to a friend from many many moons ago who now lives in az.  a short conversation and my hopes were confirmed.  she lives a short distance from phoenix and was probably as excited as me at the opportunity to catch up after 16 years.  wow.  i'm old.

i also thought that when she told me that her youngest is now 17.  um, no.  she was just a toddler.  like last week, i swear.  her other daughter is model.  i used to babysit these awesome kids.  to have known them as wee ones is to have known truly great kids.  and fun.  fun beyond words.  i can't wait to hear how they've grown up and become fantastic people.

in response to a comment i made on facebook recently the mother of these children thanked me for being a tiny piece of the puzzle that made these humans who they've become.  that was touching.  and an honor that someone i have always admired so much thanked me for contributing to the lives of her children.  all this time i was thankful to her for the things she gave me when i was a lost junior high kid.  plans for us to reconnect have been an opportunity for a great amount of reflection.  i've come a long way since then.  i'm still working on being who i always wanted to be.  she's the kind of person who gets this type of stuff.  i can't wait to hear about how she's been all this time.  to hear of her adventures.  and i can't wait to share the important parts of my journey with her.  and to tell her how much she contributed to my life.  she's a definitely a piece of the puzzle that makes up who i am.

we humans have a lot of power.  we also have the choice to use that for good or otherwise.  we are influencing and making differences in the lives of others whether we like it or not.  it happens every day that we get out of bed and interact with other humans.  please use your power for good.  you don't know who will be telling you 16 years from now that you made a difference.

to touch something real will help your wounds heal.

there i sat.  at my desk.  in the corner.  windows on all sides of me.  thinking about how i'm going to have a new niece by the time i come into work tomorrow morning and this thing rolled in.  it came in dark and fast.  looks daunting.  there are still 45 more minutes until i'll be riding my bike home from work.  it's utah.  that's plenty of time for this thing to blow over and show nothing but blue skies.  *positive thinking*

5 minutes after the first picture it looked like this.  rain.  we need that. our grass needs it.  the mountain bike trails need it.  the birds need it.  my soul needs it.  a little bit of thunder would be an added bonus.

happy "day before you're born" little daisy.  i'll do my best to be the most awesome aunt b you'll ever have.  be patient.  i'm used to boys and dirt and bugs.  i'll figure out princesses, bows and nail polish in due time.  but you have to hold up your end of the deal.  you have to be tough and go camping and ride bikes and play with puppies.  we'll shake on it soon.