gotta hold on and live your life day by day

i woke up this morning.
better than yesterday.
that is good.
while i prepared for the day i thought about yesterday.
i thought about all of the things in my life that are good. beautiful. happy. funny. lovely.
i wondered how it is that a day like yesterday is possible.
it could be that i'm really hard on myself.
i'm harder on myself than anyone else ever could be. trust me.
it's pretty much a downward spiral from there.
i don't like it.
it freaks me out.
i feel out of control.
and i definitely don't like that.

but there is a lot of beauty. wonder. love. joy. in my life.

here are just a few of the things i was reminded of this morning:

i have already taken more trips this year than most people get to take in an entire year.

i have been fortunate enough to spend a lot of time in Moab already this year.

i have two bikes.

i got new shoes yesterday.

i have a job.

i get paid.

i have a rent-a-mom and rent-a-dad who love me a lot.

i live in the mountains.

i have the best bff out there.

i defeated logic and reason by turning out to be a productive member of society.

i am ok.

i knew that.

yesterday was just a bad moment.

a small blip in the grand scheme of things.

hopefully next time i'll be able ride the wave with a little more grace.

in the meantime i need to pack for Zion.

my ride is showing up in t minus 52 hours and 23 minutes.

time is of the essence.

ha.